The Good, The Bad, and The Other Stuff

I was going to be all committed to posting three times each week, because I figured I have three days off and at some point during each of those days I should be able to pull something out of my a$% to put on paper, figuratively speaking. 

Hey, for those of you who write, remember when stuff like this would have been done at a typewriter? The first screenplays I ever wrote when I was a teenager were on a Brother word processor... at last I think that's what it was... Like, it was a typewriter, but fancy, because I think there was a little screen that showed what you were typing and I think you could save your work? Sheesh, I'm so senile. And I remember my white typewriter, and I would haul it with me if Mom and I went on a road trip, and I was like 20-something, sitting in a hotel room, smoking and typing, while Mom was a slot machine, smoking and dropping in nickels (remember, this was the OLDEN days). And there was that one word processor I had where I could save stuff on discs... I mean sheesh, I don't think I even had a computer until 1998 or so, and it was a hand-me-down from my bestie, Spook. Wow. Now it's so much easier to write now, technologically-speaking, and I am amazed when I think of all the writing I got done in the olden days, when I had to insert paper and back space with the white-out corrector to fix errors and holy heck. Just wow.

I have a sick baby at home with cabin fever. I love her to bits but she is driving me a little bit nuts. One of the reasons the words aren't flowing this week.

Also, it's been a heckuva a week. Starting Monday. The kind of week where certain parts of my life are turned upside down.

Here is what I have learned, and some of this stuff I already knew, of course:

I have the best friends and family in the world.
I'm sort of strong, like emotionally.
Life is not fair.
Banging your head against the wall hurts and is completely not at all useful.

And most importantly, my number one priority in life for the past six and half years is my daughter. And she will ALWAYS be my number on priority, period. Nothing is more important to me than her happiness and well-being.

So when you have a ball-busting few days, the good part is that you do see how much people love and care about you, you do see what you're capable of, and you force yourself to look at all the things that are in your life that are good and wonderful.

My coffee was too strong. Typing is a little hard because my fingers are sorta shaky. Not. Good.

Anyway, I have a lot of stuff in my life that brings me joy. I laugh. A lot. 

Curling up in a ball and crying about the s$%t that just ain't right is pretty ineffective. Though once in a while, you just need to curl up in a ball and cry about the s$%t that just ain't right. Then dry your tears and hug someone up who loves hugging on you, and then think about the joyful stuff.

So today is about making plans and being constructive. Like I'm gonna clean my house because it's a MESS. 

I'm also going to exercise. I've been with a head cold or sinus stuff, I swear, off and on for like 5 weeks. Not kidding. And it's taken the wind out of my sails a bit and made it easy for me to be lazy. Well, I need some endorphins. I need to feel STRONG, physically. I did 30 minutes of Wii yoga the other night and it was ridiculously therapeutic. And like, at the beginning I couldn't touch my toes and at the end I could, so there you go. Stretching my body out and breathing is soooooooooooooooo good for me.  I have to do it more often.

What's the point of this post? I have no clue. To let you guys know if you are having a f$%ked up week you're not alone, that could be one point. Also because writing stuff down sometimes helps my brain. Maybe someone will read this and exercise today, or do some yoga. That would be awesome. Mainly, if you are reading this, I encourage you to find some joy. Feel joyful, be joyful, spread it around. Cry if you need to, and then get all joyful if you can. 

If you need hugs, please take these cyberhugs I'm sending now. Feel that? That's for you! I hope it helped! Talking to you guys always helps me out, so thanks!

The Thanksgiving Post, Or the One in Which I Talk About Stuff For Which I'm Thankful and Try Not to Repeat Myself Too Much

We should totally be thankful for everything we have and the beauty that surrounds us, like, 365 days a year. But since we have this holiday with the word thanks right in there, it seems fitting that on this day in particular we should talk about all that stuff to get into the spirit of the day, you know, beyond getting stuffed to the gills and hanging out with our families and/or friends. And what a good place to start... So in no particular order here is the list of stuff for which I'd like to give thanks:

1. Getting stuffed to the gills with my family: Thanksgiving is awesome. I am so thankful I am not working today because sometimes that is the case and I show up after everyone's eaten and is already in a coma and I have my plate(s) of food by my lonesome. At least a couple of times when that happened, I was fortunate enough to have already partaken of an awesome spread at work. I am thankful that I love my family... a lot... and that they seem to feel the same way about me. We always have a good time when we're together and I'm really looking forward to this afternoon.

2. My beautiful daughter: No explanation needed, right? To be all Jerry Maguire (which I swear, is not something I normally am), she completes me. In a way that no other person or partner ever could. Motherhood is amazing, mostly because she is.

3. My friends: I only have about the best group of friends ever. Many of whom came to me late in a life but that I think I will keep forever. They're amazing, the way they put up with my insanity and my hormones and my bad judgments and they just love me. So lucky to have them (and they know who they are).

4. The Internet: It keeps me connected to people to whom I might not otherwise be connected. Or not connected on a regular basis, and that is my favorite thing about it. Also, when you don't know what something is you can Google it. You don't have to go to the library (though I do love the library, a whole lot) or pull out an encyclopedia and that's pretty badass.

5. My family: The good, the bad, and the hilarious. The whole thing. They made me who I am today and they always have my back.

6. My set-up: As in, my job, my lack of commute, my house. It's awesome. I'm making out like a bandit. I love my job and don't want to leave until they make me or I can retire. I love my house and hope to never leave it (and fantasize about owning it one day and making it bigger, but even if that never happens I still don't want to leave). And I love that the house I love is down the street from the job I love. Really, with that deal right there, what in the heck do I have to complain about?

7. Helpful drugs: You know, the kind that make your brain a little better? Like, let's say you're wired such that you think things TO DEATH, to the point of losing a great deal of sleep, and that you get easily depressed, and because you're depressed when things don't go right you kinda want to SCREAM or throw things? There are drugs that can help with that. I love that one does not have to live with faulty brain wiring their whole life if one does not want to. This one did not want to and I love that I don't have to.

8. Endorphins: Similar to helpful drugs, but natural and FREE!! Get some.

9. Food: It's just so good.

10. Dancing shows, like DWTS and SYTYCD: They make me smile. Watching people dance can make me laugh, or cry, or get goosebumps, or all of the above. It's a beautiful thing. I also love the interaction between the hosts and judges on both shows. Such fun.

11. Top Chef, Next Iron Chef, and almost any cooking show: See "food" above, for starters. I've loved cooking shows since I was a kid watching them on PBS with my mom on Saturday mornings (thanks, Mom!). Cooking competition shows are just dynamite. I love to see the things that people make, even though I will probably never make them or even taste them. But still, I can't get enough.

12. A washer and dryer at my house: If you do laundry outside your home or ever have this needs no explanation.

13. Coffee: I don't know what I'd do without it.

14. Carrie Fisher: I love her. I'm reading Shockaholic on the Kindle right now and I can tell I'm going to devour it. I think I've read all of her books; Surrender the Pink was one of my favorites, and her one-woman show was a-mah-zing. She's so real and insane and funny and has been so troubled and is so open about it. If I had to go out to lunch with two famous ladies right now, I want to go with her and Tina Fey.

15. My mom: I know I said my family, but special shout out to my mom. She is my... am I really gonna tear up? F#%king hormones! She is my rock. My touchstone. My friend. The one who drives me nuts by nagging me about stuff (stuff about which I need to be nagged). To say she has my back is an understatement. She cares for my daughter (physically, as a sitter, and emotionally, but loving her up to the moon [and yes, sometimes spoiling her]). She has bailed me out more times than I care to mention. I love hanging out with her; we've had great adventures just the two of us and with the kid and I look forward to many more. If I had to choose a mom from the fictional Mom Store of which I've told Kayla many times, I would choose her all over again. She is simply the best.

I'm thankful for a whole bunch of other stuff, but I've rambled on long enough.

What are you thankful for, today or any day or every day?