Thursday, November 24, 2011
The Thanksgiving Post, Or the One in Which I Talk About Stuff For Which I'm Thankful and Try Not to Repeat Myself Too Much
We should totally be thankful for everything we have and the beauty that surrounds us, like, 365 days a year. But since we have this holiday with the word thanks right in there, it seems fitting that on this day in particular we should talk about all that stuff to get into the spirit of the day, you know, beyond getting stuffed to the gills and hanging out with our families and/or friends. And what a good place to start... So in no particular order here is the list of stuff for which I'd like to give thanks:
1. Getting stuffed to the gills with my family: Thanksgiving is awesome. I am so thankful I am not working today because sometimes that is the case and I show up after everyone's eaten and is already in a coma and I have my plate(s) of food by my lonesome. At least a couple of times when that happened, I was fortunate enough to have already partaken of an awesome spread at work. I am thankful that I love my family... a lot... and that they seem to feel the same way about me. We always have a good time when we're together and I'm really looking forward to this afternoon.
2. My beautiful daughter: No explanation needed, right? To be all Jerry Maguire (which I swear, is not something I normally am), she completes me. In a way that no other person or partner ever could. Motherhood is amazing, mostly because she is.
3. My friends: I only have about the best group of friends ever. Many of whom came to me late in a life but that I think I will keep forever. They're amazing, the way they put up with my insanity and my hormones and my bad judgments and they just love me. So lucky to have them (and they know who they are).
4. The Internet: It keeps me connected to people to whom I might not otherwise be connected. Or not connected on a regular basis, and that is my favorite thing about it. Also, when you don't know what something is you can Google it. You don't have to go to the library (though I do love the library, a whole lot) or pull out an encyclopedia and that's pretty badass.
5. My family: The good, the bad, and the hilarious. The whole thing. They made me who I am today and they always have my back.
6. My set-up: As in, my job, my lack of commute, my house. It's awesome. I'm making out like a bandit. I love my job and don't want to leave until they make me or I can retire. I love my house and hope to never leave it (and fantasize about owning it one day and making it bigger, but even if that never happens I still don't want to leave). And I love that the house I love is down the street from the job I love. Really, with that deal right there, what in the heck do I have to complain about?
7. Helpful drugs: You know, the kind that make your brain a little better? Like, let's say you're wired such that you think things TO DEATH, to the point of losing a great deal of sleep, and that you get easily depressed, and because you're depressed when things don't go right you kinda want to SCREAM or throw things? There are drugs that can help with that. I love that one does not have to live with faulty brain wiring their whole life if one does not want to. This one did not want to and I love that I don't have to.
8. Endorphins: Similar to helpful drugs, but natural and FREE!! Get some.
9. Food: It's just so good.
10. Dancing shows, like DWTS and SYTYCD: They make me smile. Watching people dance can make me laugh, or cry, or get goosebumps, or all of the above. It's a beautiful thing. I also love the interaction between the hosts and judges on both shows. Such fun.
11. Top Chef, Next Iron Chef, and almost any cooking show: See "food" above, for starters. I've loved cooking shows since I was a kid watching them on PBS with my mom on Saturday mornings (thanks, Mom!). Cooking competition shows are just dynamite. I love to see the things that people make, even though I will probably never make them or even taste them. But still, I can't get enough.
12. A washer and dryer at my house: If you do laundry outside your home or ever have this needs no explanation.
13. Coffee: I don't know what I'd do without it.
14. Carrie Fisher: I love her. I'm reading Shockaholic on the Kindle right now and I can tell I'm going to devour it. I think I've read all of her books; Surrender the Pink was one of my favorites, and her one-woman show was a-mah-zing. She's so real and insane and funny and has been so troubled and is so open about it. If I had to go out to lunch with two famous ladies right now, I want to go with her and Tina Fey.
15. My mom: I know I said my family, but special shout out to my mom. She is my... am I really gonna tear up? F#%king hormones! She is my rock. My touchstone. My friend. The one who drives me nuts by nagging me about stuff (stuff about which I need to be nagged). To say she has my back is an understatement. She cares for my daughter (physically, as a sitter, and emotionally, but loving her up to the moon [and yes, sometimes spoiling her]). She has bailed me out more times than I care to mention. I love hanging out with her; we've had great adventures just the two of us and with the kid and I look forward to many more. If I had to choose a mom from the fictional Mom Store of which I've told Kayla many times, I would choose her all over again. She is simply the best.
I'm thankful for a whole bunch of other stuff, but I've rambled on long enough.
What are you thankful for, today or any day or every day?
Sunday, October 30, 2011
Looking Up
I turned around at work when I heard something I couldn't quite identify. It was just the coffee pot making some post-perculatory (not a real word) noises. When I turned I caught a glimpse of the sky through the trees out of our window. And the sky was amazing. It was just a few minutes ago and it's already changed so it's hard to explain, but there was such a warm, pink glow to it that it instantly calmed me.
The sky is beautiful at 7:15 on Sunday mornings sometimes.
And before I saw that sky I was tempted to write a blog about how some lessons take a really long time to learn. For example, if someone is a douche or someone is thoughtless then chances are, no matter how nice or nurturing you are to them, especially if this person comes into your life as a grown-up, chances are they will always be that way. That ends the lesson/negative portion of this blog.
I woke up this morning and I was miffed. The red numbers glowing menacingly on the clock read 5:16. These numbers in themselves are not evil, of course, but when I've set the alarm for 5:35, you can see how I'd find them to be a little bit evil because it wasn't as if I was going to just fall back into peaceful slumber for another twenty minutes. Nope, my body doesn't work that way.
So I lumbered through getting ready and went to put on my makeup and found some eyeshadow in my Sephora assortment (possibly the best $25 I ever spent even if it's not the same as the one I bought last year with my gift certificate [thanks, Sarah!])that made me look like I was awake and curled my hair and it came out okay and then I got outside to my car and saw the sky, which looked completely different then, at 6:45, than it did at 7:15. And I thought to myself, "Holy crap. The sky looks AMAZING."
Last night when we got home from the super awesome Haunted Hallway at Ellerhorst (though Kayla's reaction to the thrills and chills will be document later in my Kayla blog), as soon as I got out of the car I noticed the moon. It was a crescent, but it was so ridiculously bright, and sometimes you can't really see the part of the moon that's hidden in shadow too well, but last night that part looked so cool, like a deep, dark blue-black. I can't explain why it looked so cool, I can only tell you that it did. And the sky at 7:30 last night also looked really amazing.
So sometimes dumping the negative thoughts is as easy as looking up. Not always, but sometimes.
The sky is beautiful at 7:15 on Sunday mornings sometimes.
And before I saw that sky I was tempted to write a blog about how some lessons take a really long time to learn. For example, if someone is a douche or someone is thoughtless then chances are, no matter how nice or nurturing you are to them, especially if this person comes into your life as a grown-up, chances are they will always be that way. That ends the lesson/negative portion of this blog.
I woke up this morning and I was miffed. The red numbers glowing menacingly on the clock read 5:16. These numbers in themselves are not evil, of course, but when I've set the alarm for 5:35, you can see how I'd find them to be a little bit evil because it wasn't as if I was going to just fall back into peaceful slumber for another twenty minutes. Nope, my body doesn't work that way.
So I lumbered through getting ready and went to put on my makeup and found some eyeshadow in my Sephora assortment (possibly the best $25 I ever spent even if it's not the same as the one I bought last year with my gift certificate [thanks, Sarah!])that made me look like I was awake and curled my hair and it came out okay and then I got outside to my car and saw the sky, which looked completely different then, at 6:45, than it did at 7:15. And I thought to myself, "Holy crap. The sky looks AMAZING."
Last night when we got home from the super awesome Haunted Hallway at Ellerhorst (though Kayla's reaction to the thrills and chills will be document later in my Kayla blog), as soon as I got out of the car I noticed the moon. It was a crescent, but it was so ridiculously bright, and sometimes you can't really see the part of the moon that's hidden in shadow too well, but last night that part looked so cool, like a deep, dark blue-black. I can't explain why it looked so cool, I can only tell you that it did. And the sky at 7:30 last night also looked really amazing.
So sometimes dumping the negative thoughts is as easy as looking up. Not always, but sometimes.
Friday, October 28, 2011
Life is Like a Potluck... Don't Bring Haggis
"Be the change you want to see in the world." - Mahatma Gandhi
More than one friend has posted this quote on Facebook before and it's in my mind this morning because I think it sort of relates to want I want to say.
I was in the bathroom this morning getting ready and it's funny how sometimes things strike you while you're topless and curling your hair. Don't get me started on the fact that using hot appliances with a considerable amount of skin bare is a bad idea, and don't think that I get inspired by that bare skin because that pretty much just usually inspires laughter.
So what struck me is that life is like a potluck. But some people look at it like it's a buffet. Let me explain. And when I say that, I mean I'm going to attempt to figure out what I'm trying to say and at the same time explain it to you.
The idea of a potluck is to come together and share. You bring something and you get to partake of the goodies that others have contributed. It's give and take. You give something, and you get to take something in return.
Life is this way. Sometimes it's about a relationship. Any relationship is a partnership. Whether you're friends or lovers or spouses or parent and child or work mates. You bring something to it, and the other person is supposed to bring the same amount. Of course, this can be tricky if you're talking about a parent and a child, and certainly with spouses this is sometimes only a theory, but you get the idea.
I'm thinking particularly about what you bring that can't be quantified. How are you showing up? What's your attitude? What sort of energy are you bringing? Either to your office or your home in your interaction with your kids or your spouse or your friends? Do you bring what you would like to get back?
Do you bring a casserole made of haggis, head cheese, and random animal testicles (thank you, Facebook friends! [and no matter how fancy a chef makes them, testicles OF ANY ANIMAL are never going to be anything I try, like the lamb "fries" I saw on Chopped]) and then expect to eat lobster, caviar, fancy delicious cheeses, and Doritos? Well, it doesn't work that way.
You get back what you give, pure and simple.
Buffets are awesome things. You get to show up and take whatever you want. Life is not like that. You need to give something, and you should give what you want to get back.
Do you walk into a room and light it up? Or do you come in under a gray cloud and spread it all over the place? If you do that second thing, STOP DOING THAT.
The people who will read this probably don't do that. So let me talk to the rest of us. But first I'll say, I've totally been that cloud. I can't lie. Like, especially at certain times of the month, get out your umbrella because there might be nothing but gray skies and rain all around my space bubble. But I really really really try not to be that person. And I really really really try not let that kind of person drag me down.
But let's face it, it's hard. We're only human, for goodness sake. It's hard not to get sucked into some jacked up energy, especially if you're not in a great place and having one of those "fake it 'til you make it" days (and by the way, I am a really big fan of faking it 'til I make it, because it sometimes really works).
Now look, sometimes stuff is just really super crazy awful bad. So bad that you'd be a freak if you could figure out a way to put a positive spin on it. Some of the stuff that people endure from which they come back fighting AMAZES me. They are my heroes. So I'm not talking about sucking it up when it comes to real problems.
I am talking about being positive when you can be. When you have the choice between positive and negative, choose positive. When you have the choice between a frown and smile, pick the smile. When you can't decide whether to laugh or have a rage stroke, try the laughter.
I know, this all seems so basic, but you would be amazed at how not basic it is for some people. You know, the people who probably aren't reading this.
I'm not really sure that my opening quote really goes with what I what I just rambled about, but I'll keep it there because it's a good one anyway.
Like with almost anything I write, I do this so that I can remind myself to be this person more. So thanks for letting me talk to you in an effort to work on my stuff.
And please, if I ever have a potluck, do not bring that casserole. Thanks.
More than one friend has posted this quote on Facebook before and it's in my mind this morning because I think it sort of relates to want I want to say.
I was in the bathroom this morning getting ready and it's funny how sometimes things strike you while you're topless and curling your hair. Don't get me started on the fact that using hot appliances with a considerable amount of skin bare is a bad idea, and don't think that I get inspired by that bare skin because that pretty much just usually inspires laughter.
So what struck me is that life is like a potluck. But some people look at it like it's a buffet. Let me explain. And when I say that, I mean I'm going to attempt to figure out what I'm trying to say and at the same time explain it to you.
The idea of a potluck is to come together and share. You bring something and you get to partake of the goodies that others have contributed. It's give and take. You give something, and you get to take something in return.
Life is this way. Sometimes it's about a relationship. Any relationship is a partnership. Whether you're friends or lovers or spouses or parent and child or work mates. You bring something to it, and the other person is supposed to bring the same amount. Of course, this can be tricky if you're talking about a parent and a child, and certainly with spouses this is sometimes only a theory, but you get the idea.
I'm thinking particularly about what you bring that can't be quantified. How are you showing up? What's your attitude? What sort of energy are you bringing? Either to your office or your home in your interaction with your kids or your spouse or your friends? Do you bring what you would like to get back?
Do you bring a casserole made of haggis, head cheese, and random animal testicles (thank you, Facebook friends! [and no matter how fancy a chef makes them, testicles OF ANY ANIMAL are never going to be anything I try, like the lamb "fries" I saw on Chopped]) and then expect to eat lobster, caviar, fancy delicious cheeses, and Doritos? Well, it doesn't work that way.
You get back what you give, pure and simple.
Buffets are awesome things. You get to show up and take whatever you want. Life is not like that. You need to give something, and you should give what you want to get back.
Do you walk into a room and light it up? Or do you come in under a gray cloud and spread it all over the place? If you do that second thing, STOP DOING THAT.
The people who will read this probably don't do that. So let me talk to the rest of us. But first I'll say, I've totally been that cloud. I can't lie. Like, especially at certain times of the month, get out your umbrella because there might be nothing but gray skies and rain all around my space bubble. But I really really really try not to be that person. And I really really really try not let that kind of person drag me down.
But let's face it, it's hard. We're only human, for goodness sake. It's hard not to get sucked into some jacked up energy, especially if you're not in a great place and having one of those "fake it 'til you make it" days (and by the way, I am a really big fan of faking it 'til I make it, because it sometimes really works).
Now look, sometimes stuff is just really super crazy awful bad. So bad that you'd be a freak if you could figure out a way to put a positive spin on it. Some of the stuff that people endure from which they come back fighting AMAZES me. They are my heroes. So I'm not talking about sucking it up when it comes to real problems.
I am talking about being positive when you can be. When you have the choice between positive and negative, choose positive. When you have the choice between a frown and smile, pick the smile. When you can't decide whether to laugh or have a rage stroke, try the laughter.
I know, this all seems so basic, but you would be amazed at how not basic it is for some people. You know, the people who probably aren't reading this.
I'm not really sure that my opening quote really goes with what I what I just rambled about, but I'll keep it there because it's a good one anyway.
Like with almost anything I write, I do this so that I can remind myself to be this person more. So thanks for letting me talk to you in an effort to work on my stuff.
And please, if I ever have a potluck, do not bring that casserole. Thanks.
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Some Things Change a Little and Some Not So Much and Sort of a Re-Run Post
Since yesterday I kvetched about stuff I don't like, I figured it made perfect sense to do a post about stuff I love today. About stuff that makes me smile and get all warm fuzzy-like in hopes it would make you guys think of stuff you love and then you'd feel all warm and fuzzy and someone would pass by and see you grinning like an idiot and then they would feel all warm and fuzzy and so on and so forth. Like, how super cool and badass would that be? So I started to type and then I thought wow, this feels familiar... So I checked the archives and found a post from 2008 that well, pretty much covers a bunch of stuff I love. But before you check that out...
... I have to say that while the things I love I have remarkably (or not so remarkably) pretty much have stayed the same (though I will add a few things, just because), the beginning of my post talks about how my life was at the time and how I didn't really want to talk about my life. Which makes perfect sense because I was less than three months away from finally separating from my ex so yes, my home life kinda sucked hard at that time. And now I can say wow. It so DOES NOT SUCK. Like, at all. Sure, I have things I need to work on and change and I get confused about stuff that has to do with boys and just life in general but mostly, wow. I. Love. My. Life. So I'm glad I included that blurb because it makes me really, really, really, really, extremely, very much, a whole helluva lot appreciate where I am.
Here's some stuff I really like that wasn't in the original post:
1. Skinny Fries: Trader Joe's makes them and you can eat 65 of them for 110 calories and 2 grams of fat and they kinda taste like a French fry crossed with a potato chip crossed with air. And they are good for dipping. And I just ate some a minute ago which is why they made my list.
2. Trader Joe's: Damn, they have a lot of good stuff in that store. And a lot of cheese. And decent prices on many things. And the people are always nice, too.
3. That I'm finally actually dieting and losing weight: After years of false starts and no will to give up using food for much-needed comfort, I'm finally getting it done. It won't be fast, but I will do it this time and I couldn't do it without...
4. Major support: ... from my friends and family who are working on their weight loss goals and the ones who just cheer for me when I talk about how much I've lost. Between Facebook and myfitnesspal.com and the close pals I talk to nearly everyday, I have more support than I could ever hope to get and it makes a huge difference in my life. I see a light at the end of the tunnel that I haven't seen in years and this is beyond priceless to me.
5. On-line dating websites: Shout out to them because they get a bad rap and in some respects, sure, there are a lot of losers and weirdos out there, no doubt, and if you are on one of these sites they, meaning weirdos and losers, will wind up contacting you. But you might also find that you meet some interesting folks and have some interesting experiences, and have guys say nice things about you that you kind of needed to hear for like ummmm... ever. Not saying they are for everyone and I've already pointed out the considerable downside, but for someone like me who doesn't ever have friends who know anyone with whom I should mix and mingle (which reminds me of one of my favorite Phineas and Ferb songs) and who has no possibilities in the workplace and who doesn't hang out in bars, well, there you go. It has its uses.
6. Being single: Kinda think it was meant for me. Can't say enough how much I love sharing my space only with a small person.
7. The Internet: Recipes, pictures of Australian blue-tongued lizards, it's all on there. And it seems to be the way I do a huge portion of my communicating with friends.
8. Beer: It's yummy and I like to drink it with friends and I like finding new varieties that I enjoy.
9. Naps: No explanation needed.
10. Sex: See naps.
Click here for the a link to my post from December 22, 2008, to see more stuff I love.
What are you loving at the moment?
... I have to say that while the things I love I have remarkably (or not so remarkably) pretty much have stayed the same (though I will add a few things, just because), the beginning of my post talks about how my life was at the time and how I didn't really want to talk about my life. Which makes perfect sense because I was less than three months away from finally separating from my ex so yes, my home life kinda sucked hard at that time. And now I can say wow. It so DOES NOT SUCK. Like, at all. Sure, I have things I need to work on and change and I get confused about stuff that has to do with boys and just life in general but mostly, wow. I. Love. My. Life. So I'm glad I included that blurb because it makes me really, really, really, really, extremely, very much, a whole helluva lot appreciate where I am.
Here's some stuff I really like that wasn't in the original post:
1. Skinny Fries: Trader Joe's makes them and you can eat 65 of them for 110 calories and 2 grams of fat and they kinda taste like a French fry crossed with a potato chip crossed with air. And they are good for dipping. And I just ate some a minute ago which is why they made my list.
2. Trader Joe's: Damn, they have a lot of good stuff in that store. And a lot of cheese. And decent prices on many things. And the people are always nice, too.
3. That I'm finally actually dieting and losing weight: After years of false starts and no will to give up using food for much-needed comfort, I'm finally getting it done. It won't be fast, but I will do it this time and I couldn't do it without...
4. Major support: ... from my friends and family who are working on their weight loss goals and the ones who just cheer for me when I talk about how much I've lost. Between Facebook and myfitnesspal.com and the close pals I talk to nearly everyday, I have more support than I could ever hope to get and it makes a huge difference in my life. I see a light at the end of the tunnel that I haven't seen in years and this is beyond priceless to me.
5. On-line dating websites: Shout out to them because they get a bad rap and in some respects, sure, there are a lot of losers and weirdos out there, no doubt, and if you are on one of these sites they, meaning weirdos and losers, will wind up contacting you. But you might also find that you meet some interesting folks and have some interesting experiences, and have guys say nice things about you that you kind of needed to hear for like ummmm... ever. Not saying they are for everyone and I've already pointed out the considerable downside, but for someone like me who doesn't ever have friends who know anyone with whom I should mix and mingle (which reminds me of one of my favorite Phineas and Ferb songs) and who has no possibilities in the workplace and who doesn't hang out in bars, well, there you go. It has its uses.
6. Being single: Kinda think it was meant for me. Can't say enough how much I love sharing my space only with a small person.
7. The Internet: Recipes, pictures of Australian blue-tongued lizards, it's all on there. And it seems to be the way I do a huge portion of my communicating with friends.
8. Beer: It's yummy and I like to drink it with friends and I like finding new varieties that I enjoy.
9. Naps: No explanation needed.
10. Sex: See naps.
Click here for the a link to my post from December 22, 2008, to see more stuff I love.
What are you loving at the moment?
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Things of Which I Am Majorly Not a Fan
Ms. Tams had a blog post the other day called "Things I Hate... " So since she has inspired me A LOT recently by like, sending me ideas and telling me to write more I am going to go ahead and steal be inspired by her idea and come up with a similar list. Because I need to flipping write something. At the moment I'm wondering why I always try to do this close to nap time when I'm so sleepy. Probably not a good idea when I'm barely coherent when I'm wide awake.
While I am going to go ahead and complain about this stuff, in general, I don't want to complain. I really don't. I don't want to send my food back or tell someone providing a service for me that they didn't do well and I want to like any gift I receive and I want to adapt and go with the flow rather than have anyone make some change for me. Like, that's my default setting, or at least I hope it is most of the time, but I vent. I can't help it. I do. And I try to do it with a sense of humor and I blow off steam about it and drop an f-bomb or five and then I'm over it. So is this venting, is this complaining, or is this just me looking at that top part of the glass with no beer in it, who knows. I'm just sharing and maybe I'll connect with someone who is also not pleased about the fact that they have zits AND gray hair.
1. Cable TV: Well, any of you know me know that this is a love/hate relationship to be sure. I love TV in general. I do not love taking it up the a$% cablerarily each month when I pay my bill. I would like to be able to design something where I have the like, the 12 channels I want and can get rid of the 388 I don't want and only pay for 12 channels and not 400.
2. Not being able to get my chair right at work: We have nice chairs. I am a moron. I have a hard time some days getting the angle of the seat and back just like I like it (see the part about being a moron).
3. Obliviousness: I am talking about people in a store or a crowd anywhere who for some reason have decided they are the only ones there and do not need to pay attention about being in your space or your path. I'm really big. How do you not see that you're in my way?
4. Rude drivers: 'Nuff said.
5. Crowds: I only deal with them if I must. Some things are fun to do with a large group of people, like a watch a concert or a movie. Otherwise, I dig it when places are relatively empty. Like Target. How wonderful Target is when it's not crowded. Or a restaurant. Or a waiting room, whatever. I'm sure this has something to do with being a big person and always kind of feeling like a bull in a china shop, too. Crowds don't scare me or anything, they just bug me.
6. Snobs: Hmmm... how to explain this one... If you automatically think you're better than someone because you have more money than they do, or because of where that person came from, geographically speaking, or because you've had more schooling, or because of your line of work compared to theirs, you can suck it.
7. Body hair: My wish is for world peace and hair that grows on your body only where you want it to grow.
8. Having acne... as a f$%king grown woman: So. I've paid some dues. I made it through junior high. Terrible hair. Awful eyebrows. Pregnancy. Being in the workforce for 24 years. A failed marriage. Flaky guys on on-line dating websites. 41 birthdays. Should it not be time for me to catch a break in the form of not having zits? On the one hand, great, my skin is so oily that wrinkles are probably far, far away for me. For this I am thankful. And I know, I should be more diligent and consistent about my skincare, no doubt. But I swear, my nose is a blackhead masquerading as a nose. I don't even get how I can smell out of that thing because seriously, it's just one huge clogged pore. Okay, that's gross, but you get the idea. Raise your hand if you thought you'd hit some magic age in your twenties and never ever see a zit again? Yep, same here.
Most other things of which I'm majorly not a fan have to do with me, and that's a post for another time. What's bugging you in general or today specifically?
While I am going to go ahead and complain about this stuff, in general, I don't want to complain. I really don't. I don't want to send my food back or tell someone providing a service for me that they didn't do well and I want to like any gift I receive and I want to adapt and go with the flow rather than have anyone make some change for me. Like, that's my default setting, or at least I hope it is most of the time, but I vent. I can't help it. I do. And I try to do it with a sense of humor and I blow off steam about it and drop an f-bomb or five and then I'm over it. So is this venting, is this complaining, or is this just me looking at that top part of the glass with no beer in it, who knows. I'm just sharing and maybe I'll connect with someone who is also not pleased about the fact that they have zits AND gray hair.
1. Cable TV: Well, any of you know me know that this is a love/hate relationship to be sure. I love TV in general. I do not love taking it up the a$% cablerarily each month when I pay my bill. I would like to be able to design something where I have the like, the 12 channels I want and can get rid of the 388 I don't want and only pay for 12 channels and not 400.
2. Not being able to get my chair right at work: We have nice chairs. I am a moron. I have a hard time some days getting the angle of the seat and back just like I like it (see the part about being a moron).
3. Obliviousness: I am talking about people in a store or a crowd anywhere who for some reason have decided they are the only ones there and do not need to pay attention about being in your space or your path. I'm really big. How do you not see that you're in my way?
4. Rude drivers: 'Nuff said.
5. Crowds: I only deal with them if I must. Some things are fun to do with a large group of people, like a watch a concert or a movie. Otherwise, I dig it when places are relatively empty. Like Target. How wonderful Target is when it's not crowded. Or a restaurant. Or a waiting room, whatever. I'm sure this has something to do with being a big person and always kind of feeling like a bull in a china shop, too. Crowds don't scare me or anything, they just bug me.
6. Snobs: Hmmm... how to explain this one... If you automatically think you're better than someone because you have more money than they do, or because of where that person came from, geographically speaking, or because you've had more schooling, or because of your line of work compared to theirs, you can suck it.
7. Body hair: My wish is for world peace and hair that grows on your body only where you want it to grow.
8. Having acne... as a f$%king grown woman: So. I've paid some dues. I made it through junior high. Terrible hair. Awful eyebrows. Pregnancy. Being in the workforce for 24 years. A failed marriage. Flaky guys on on-line dating websites. 41 birthdays. Should it not be time for me to catch a break in the form of not having zits? On the one hand, great, my skin is so oily that wrinkles are probably far, far away for me. For this I am thankful. And I know, I should be more diligent and consistent about my skincare, no doubt. But I swear, my nose is a blackhead masquerading as a nose. I don't even get how I can smell out of that thing because seriously, it's just one huge clogged pore. Okay, that's gross, but you get the idea. Raise your hand if you thought you'd hit some magic age in your twenties and never ever see a zit again? Yep, same here.
Most other things of which I'm majorly not a fan have to do with me, and that's a post for another time. What's bugging you in general or today specifically?
Saturday, September 17, 2011
The Post About What I'm Thinking About Right Now
In no particular order, certainly not in order of importance, I'm just going to talk about what's on my mind at the moment. And when I say it won't be in order of importance, I mean that probably nothing will be important so you might want to stop reading right now.
I don't have time to really sit and think of a composed sort of anything; my mind is a jumble of thoughts because I haven't finished my second cup of coffee and I'm on a time constraint because I've gotta get on the treadie so I can get in 40-ish minutes and have enough time to get ready and make a quick trip to the store before Spook picks me up for the Lafayette Art and Wine Festival today where we will see the Spazmatics play, yes, those NERDS THAT ROCK. (I'd think you'd say "nerds who rock," but hey, it's from their website.
Anyway, in my head:
Sleeping in was awesome. First time I've been able to stay in bed until 8 in a month.
Doing all this blogging has been swell, but I'm going to have to work on my posture at my desk. Don't think I'm terrible ergonomically correct at home and I'm feeling it in my old neck.
This week I WILL use the weight room at work. Tams has mentioned the weight room at her gym a couple of times, in her blog and on Facebook and I have been talking about how I have been doing ZERO strength training which makes no sense when a) I like it and b) I know how good it is for me, when it comes to my bones and metabolism and c) I have weights at home and d) I can use the weight room at work. For free. Whenever I want. And it's down street from my house. So I will be doing that at least once if not twice this week. Maybe it was never in my head because I didn't want people from work potentially seeing me look like a hag in workout clothes and no makeup? Ummm, I'm over that.
I need to clean my house. I mean, like, all the parts of my house, not just the parts I usually do because we're in them or the parts that company might see. It's redonk. Have I mentioned how much I hate cleaning the house?
With all this zucchini in my freezer (9 cups at the moment, thanks to gifts from the gardens of Steph and my next door neighbor), I WILL figure out a way to sneak some into Kayla's mouth this week. Whether it be in a muffin or a cookie or a smoothie, I gotta get this kid to eat vegetables. Not even MORE vegetables. ANY vegetables. I've laid such a bad foundation by not being more conventional about our eating habits. I gotta work on that s#%t.
I was reading Buddhism for Dummies in the john (a. k. a. "The Reading Room) this morning and I need to spend more time reading it. Such good stuff in there. About suffering and ending it and living morally. Yes. I need to be there.
Okay, my time's beyond being up. I know I mentioned this earlier this week, but my time management skills suck. I need to work on that.
What are you thinking about today?
I don't have time to really sit and think of a composed sort of anything; my mind is a jumble of thoughts because I haven't finished my second cup of coffee and I'm on a time constraint because I've gotta get on the treadie so I can get in 40-ish minutes and have enough time to get ready and make a quick trip to the store before Spook picks me up for the Lafayette Art and Wine Festival today where we will see the Spazmatics play, yes, those NERDS THAT ROCK. (I'd think you'd say "nerds who rock," but hey, it's from their website.
Anyway, in my head:
Sleeping in was awesome. First time I've been able to stay in bed until 8 in a month.
Doing all this blogging has been swell, but I'm going to have to work on my posture at my desk. Don't think I'm terrible ergonomically correct at home and I'm feeling it in my old neck.
This week I WILL use the weight room at work. Tams has mentioned the weight room at her gym a couple of times, in her blog and on Facebook and I have been talking about how I have been doing ZERO strength training which makes no sense when a) I like it and b) I know how good it is for me, when it comes to my bones and metabolism and c) I have weights at home and d) I can use the weight room at work. For free. Whenever I want. And it's down street from my house. So I will be doing that at least once if not twice this week. Maybe it was never in my head because I didn't want people from work potentially seeing me look like a hag in workout clothes and no makeup? Ummm, I'm over that.
I need to clean my house. I mean, like, all the parts of my house, not just the parts I usually do because we're in them or the parts that company might see. It's redonk. Have I mentioned how much I hate cleaning the house?
With all this zucchini in my freezer (9 cups at the moment, thanks to gifts from the gardens of Steph and my next door neighbor), I WILL figure out a way to sneak some into Kayla's mouth this week. Whether it be in a muffin or a cookie or a smoothie, I gotta get this kid to eat vegetables. Not even MORE vegetables. ANY vegetables. I've laid such a bad foundation by not being more conventional about our eating habits. I gotta work on that s#%t.
I was reading Buddhism for Dummies in the john (a. k. a. "The Reading Room) this morning and I need to spend more time reading it. Such good stuff in there. About suffering and ending it and living morally. Yes. I need to be there.
Okay, my time's beyond being up. I know I mentioned this earlier this week, but my time management skills suck. I need to work on that.
What are you thinking about today?
Friday, September 16, 2011
Money and Stuff I Don't Spend it On Like Purses
In human years I am 41. In money sense years I am approximately 11.
And buying books encourages bookworminess. Which encourages her to be smart. Which encourages her to be so involved in her studies when she is older that she pays no attention to boys whatsoever and she gets into an amazing college where she studies science and becomes a doctor and finds a cure for all the incurable diseases.
Okay, so I'm pushing it a little. But we will get a lot of use out of those books. And when she is done with them we will pass them on to her baby cousin, and who knows how many years they will be around. I could almost buy a fancy purse on sale at Macy's for what I spent on book fair books.
But I really wanted to get those books for her.
What do you spend money on that you shouldn't? Are there "fancy" things you just can't live without, places where you refuse to not splurge? How do you like to save money or stick to a budget?
Actually, I might have had more sense about money at the age of 11, when my income was from a paper route and said income was spent on video games and Tootsie Roll Pops at 7-11 (it was a small and relatively unprofitable route).
I will come out and say that I am a complete and utter idiot when it comes to money. Here is what I know about it: I go to work and make some. Then I turn around and spend more than that on stuff I don't need. I have run out of it several times and have been embarrassingly bailed out by my mother more times than I care to count. I am pretty sure I owe her one million dollars, though she says I work some of it off by carting her around sometimes so maybe I owe her more like $999,900 at this point.
I have set out to make a budget a whole bunch of times. But I'm pretty sure that never happened. I can always tell you how much I pay in bills each month. There's no variable. It's the "other stuff" that trips me up.
So on the one hand, I eat out too much; mostly at work, sometimes going out with friends. I am not sure what my beer budget is, but it's pretty high compared to most households, I'd imagine.
I wind up spending a lot of money on grooming. I just got my hair done today and if I had the skills to do it myself or if I ever took my friend's advice and let her do it for me I would save A LOT of money. But I've been seeing Bernice for years and years and I'm a creature of habit and I like how she does my hair so there you go. I also can't use cheap shampoo (as much as I'd LOVE to) because of the kind of hair I have, so there's more money.
Don't even get me started on waxing. I gotta wax my brows. I can't not go and see Bev. Don't ask me about parts I get waxed that no one ever seems to see. It's pretty ridiculous.
And then there's stuff on which I refuse to spend money. Like purses.
I had this purse I LOVED and the only reason I am no longer carrying it is that I wore it out. It was from Target and made of fabric and it was a black and white floral pattern and it was so flipping cute. And it was $8.
That's right. $8. It was normally $10, but I got it on sale for $8 because I'm cool like that.
So in my pursuit to replace this purse with an almost exact replica, I searched high and low. Checked at Target every time I was there, no dice. Finally found it on Etsy and it was $26. I went back and forth with myself about it. $26? But I really want another purse for $8. Here was a purse that was adorable, hand-made, machine-washable, and I loved it. Yet I was hemming and hawing about it being $26. This blew the mind of my dear friend, Stephanie, when this come up when I was hanging out with her, Spook, and Sarah. She could not believe I would trip off of something like that when I do spend money on other stuff. How much had I spent for this particular girls' night? How much would I spend for a sushi lunch (seriously, like $24 sometimes with tax and all that).
And it was hard to explain why I want a purse for $8 and I want t-shirts that cost about the same and I why I don't even want to spend $30 on a pair of jeans and why I like to buy shoes at Payless. The only way it possibly makes sense is if I say it is wasted on me.
If you gave me a purse that cost $100 and a pair of jeans for the same amount I would look at you like you thought I was the Queen of West County. Why, these are garments and accessories made for royalty, I would say to you.
I TOTALLY don't begrudge anyone their fancy pants or real jewelry (I'm pretty much a fakey fakerson when it comes to that, mainly because losing earrings is what I do), and I'd never pass judgment. Okay, that's not entirely true. If I knew someone who was kind of a douche and they had a pair of $200 jeans I might say, "Oh my gosh, that guy is such a flipping douche in his $200 jeans."
To many I realize I look like an idiot because I DO spend money and I have too much stuff but not so many nice things to show for what I spend. So this isn't about me being cheap, sheesh, I wish I were were. It's just that when it comes to some things I want to spend this many dollars and with other stuff I will spend more dollars.
I went to the book fair at the kid's school today and spent 40-plus dollars on books. We go to the library. Where we can check out books. For FREE. But the kid's a bookworm and she digs owning books. As in, "I get to keep this one? All the time??"
And buying books encourages bookworminess. Which encourages her to be smart. Which encourages her to be so involved in her studies when she is older that she pays no attention to boys whatsoever and she gets into an amazing college where she studies science and becomes a doctor and finds a cure for all the incurable diseases.Okay, so I'm pushing it a little. But we will get a lot of use out of those books. And when she is done with them we will pass them on to her baby cousin, and who knows how many years they will be around. I could almost buy a fancy purse on sale at Macy's for what I spent on book fair books.
But I really wanted to get those books for her.
What do you spend money on that you shouldn't? Are there "fancy" things you just can't live without, places where you refuse to not splurge? How do you like to save money or stick to a budget?
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